Its funny how life turns out, you think you know something and you find out you don’t. Nothing is ever what it seems. Everything is constantly changing. Either because what you know is a lie or it has already changed. Sometimes it feels like our emotions are trying to catch up to the ramification of what has just occurred.

How do you give up on life when you can’t really check out? It’s a tough question and it’s even harder for a “good” person.  How do you hurt without hurting? How do you stay good but get to do bad?  Is there any relief for a person who is just sick and tired. A person who needs to escape before they explode? Well I’m going to figure it out because I am that person. For years now I have been exhausted, but more so now. Well I guess I shouldn’t say that because I can’t seem to think of any other time but now. It's like i"m waiting for my life to begin or maybe end, only in a good way of course. I mean if the most i'll ever be is who I am then technically aint i simply waiting for the end? I say that because some people feel that statement may sound like a cry for help. NO PEOPLE I"M NOT WANTING IT TO ALL END, but since i plan to make it to heaven, it's not bad to think about.